I was hoping this morning that I could find something to train my atom-like lazer beam of focused hatred upon. The internet has not let me down, for I give to you.. Townsend.

This is an "update" of Pour Some Sugar on Me, the inspired Def Leopard call to arms, as envisioned by the boyband Townsend. The video, which you can watch in it's entirety, is at once both gag-reflex inducing and eye burningly awful. Those things that conspire to make this song and video so bad are not just the "hip/hop" breakdown in the middle of the song, nor the $5 dollar budget (nice wigs), it's not even the inexplicable cameo of the guy from Smashmouth and his "gay" roommate. (both of whom I am convinced are only in the video because the Smashmouth guy's little brother is the lead singer of Townsend, of this I have no proof other than the same misshapen lumpy skull structure they both apparently inherited from a huge boulder)

In fact, trying to pin down exactly what makes this song and video so bad would only serve to lesson exactly how bad it is. Meaning, there is no way I can describe to you it's inherent lameness. This, you must drink of yourself. Let the biting, sharp, bleakness wash over you. Do not fight it, for that will only entangle you in it's constricting grasp even more-so. (link via metafilter)

"As consume-promoting branding or its subversive inversion, lovable kitsch or urban art, Hello Kitty or Obey Giant - character representation, abstract and reduced to the essentials, has redefined the aesthetic standards of visual communication world-wide."

The Pictoplasma Archive is a collection of more than 6000 character designs by some 800 artists, illustrators, and companies from all over the globe. The site attempts to explore why we as humans are so drawn to these characters.

In addition to the website, those involved also hold installations and exhibitions of their collections of character designs. This year they are holding a conference. (via boingboing)

We have a lot to learn from this collection. I read in Giant Robot magazine once about the lady who did the original design for the character Hello Kitty. She was just some company artist. I have this image of her turning out 500 cute cat characters a day, and by chance one of them caught the eye of the japanese schoolgirl set. And it was all over. The next day, this lady was moving on to designing whatever the company wanted next, like a spearmint flavored frog... or something. Only years later would she learn what kind of evil she had unleashed on the world.

This has got me thinking about what clunkyrobot should be, or what it could be, or even what the hell it actually is. (none of these I'm even close to being sure about) I love Shepard Fairey's whole phenomenology take on street art. In that, he is promoting nothing. The only thing his stickers and posters are promoting is the recognition of more posters and stickers. And of course this philosophy is quickly co-opted and eaten alive by the advertising juggernauts.

I also love Hello Kitty for much the same reason. (with admittedly a very consumer bent, and when I say "love" I mean it like, I respect Hello Kitty, not like, I've got their bedsheets or anything, although there'd be nothing wrong with that) When Hello Kitty was at it's biggest in Japan, there was no Hello Kitty cartoon, no Hello Kitty Video Games. Hello Kitty was just a product. The merchandise came first. It wasn't based on a popular saturday morning cartoon, the cartoon was based on a popular sales product.

something to chew on.

My brain is creating mathematical inventions
when we comin through, we crossin all dimensions.

it's a rap song about string theory.
it begins with a sample from Carl Sagan's Cosmos.

destroy.the.past_v3

as always, it can also be found here, living with it's brothers:
dj.clunky page
With this song, we finally fill out our first 5 song EP. These songs may be tinkered with here and there. But the track listing are set, clunkyrobot - station.signals EP is ready to go. Go where? Beats me, maybe in your pocket, if you want it. Free of charge, or rather, costing only the price of shipping. Of course, you can always download our tracks for free on the afformetnioned page. But with the physical CD will come handmade one-off art, stickers, and possibly many other exciting world changing things, that can fit inside of a jewelcase.

but more on that later.

So I was poking around iTunes this morning. See, I don't have the money to spend on music. Seriously, I shouldn't be spending any money on music... I always tell myself that. However, there are a few exceptions.

One is, if I ever see any new motown records.
the other is, if I ever see any new Ben Folds.

Well, I have a good excuse to buy new music, Ben Folds has released his third EP, Super D.

This is the third is a series of 3 EPs. Ben Folds is doing this great thing... when he completes 5 songs, he makes an EP. His plan, it has been reported, was to make 3 EPs, then use those 3 EPs to create a full length album. The benefit for the record company is far less, but the benefits for the lovers of Ben Folds Music is 4 fold... heh. Seriously though, not only do we get his music as he makes it, but we will also get brand new recordings for his full length album.

All is good.

So the bad news is, I haven't had time to finish anything for the website. But there are a couple of things I need to put up, including my photo essay, and an awesome letter we got from a Canadian punk named Gina, filled with stickers and trinkets of all kinds. Which is, possibly the most rewarding letter I've gotten since the very first, from a thoughtful fellow named Aaron of Boston. If I could cultivate a punk rock canadian fan base, the world would be ripe for domination. Gina, I'll try to send you something cool, at least as cool as the stuff you sent me, your letter and it's accompanying treasure trove of goodies will all be posted here for posterity.

The good news is, I'm back and will be posting any interesting things I find.

As related to the topmost paragraph, I've got a new shipment of clunkyrobot stickers in, for those of you waiting to receive yours, they will be in the mail soon, and if you want some, you know where to get them.

We are still on website vacation. But we're back from Vegas. It was a blast.

Check back on Sat. the 21st for vegas photos and funny stories. And maybe some new artfully arty content as well.

Until then, there is this bit of news:
Sealab scripts for auction
4 days left for you to bid on 12 original Sealab 2021 scripts. All directly from our office printer. Some have notes in the margins, some are rejected scripts that will never be produced, some are in various stages of production. All are stapled.

see you saturday!

Clunkyrobot.com is taking a short break.

please check back on August 21st for new posts and content!

thanks!

You Have Bad Taste In Music.

"Recent studies in Scientific Proof Magazine reveal that 94.9% of all pre-teens and teenagers suffer from bad taste in music. 5.9% had no taste at all."

also,

"When Linkin Park is considered the derivative, what do you call the derivative of the derivative? You call it the 2004 Grammy Award Winner for Best New Artist, Evanescence."

"On August 3, 2004 @ 16:38 GMT (12:38 PM EDT) the Space Telescope Imaging Spectrograph (STIS) suspended after suffering a failed command echo check between the Control Section (CS) of the STIS Main Electronics Box (MEB) and the Multi-Anode Micro-channel Array (MAMA) Control Electronics (MCE)."

Yes, that jumble of acronyms and initials means that the Hubble Space Telescope is dead. The telescope responsible for famous images such as this has entered into "Suspend" status and will no longer be functional for deep space imaging. (via metafilter)

Footage of the new Batmobile...

here

This looks like a vehicle from the Jurassic Park line of toys, or maybe Dinosaucers. Here's hoping it gets jazzed up in "post."

Will this installment of Batman "get it right?" Why is it that everyone in they're right mind knows exactly what a Batman movie should look like, except the people getting paid millions of dollars to actually produce it. (link via linkfilter)

And for those of you who have not seen it...
Team America!!

C.A. Childers, of apeinfinitum.net, has officially released his new book of poetry, for which I was honored to illustrate the cover of. (previously mentioned here)

An Education for Field Mice.

In the spirit of starving artistry C.A. has graciously opted to release the book in as many free formats as is currently possible. Including a tight HTML edition, and alterable and interactive Wiki edition, a home printable PDF edition, as well as the slick Print edition from Lulu.com for a mere $6.50. The Lulu.com edition will be the only one available with my fancy schmancy cover in it's full 300dpi glory. And at $6.50 you are only paying for the printing, C.A. makes no money from that sale.

Also, in the interest of furthering the evolution of his book, C.A. has released the whole shebang, including my cover, under a creative commons license. The same license this website is produced under.

Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike.

In C.A.'s words:
"Under the above license, you are free to copy, distribute, display, and perform this work. In addition, you are free to produce derivative works from it. To the point, such behavior is encouraged. There are, however, a few rules whichmust be observed. First, you must give the original author credit. Second, you may not use this work for commercial purposes. Third, if you alter, transform, or build upon this work,you may distribute the resulting work only under a license identical to this one. So, there you have it. I guess the real question revolves around what you might do with it,now that it's yours."

My fellow co-workers Ed, Mack and Neal sat down with Rob T. Firefly of Pod-six.net for a very chummy interview. I think they came out smelling like roses. Despite the guys on the toonzone.net forum who took great pride in hating all over them.

Check out The Silly Spidermonkey Fiasco, the sketch comedy show of Ed and Neal. All of their sketches are viewable on their website.